Stork Fountain

stork_draftApril 2013

Click here to tear down the Berlin Wall
Sign this petition to end the vicious actions of the Third Reich
Send an email to Pol Pot outlining why you disagree with his actions
153,217 people disapprove of thermonuclear war – join the conversation!

The revolution will not be live-blogged
The revolution will not be liked, shared, tweeted or retweeted, distorted, mangled, nor explained using humorous photographs of cats

There’s a storm in the Winter Palace
As Vladimir Putin receives his hundred thousandth message
Urging him to chill out with the whole dictator thing
Sent to him by some kid in Berkshire
To fill time between morning coffee
And prêt for lunch

The revolution will not be touchscreen
Splayed out on tablets
Each one a metallic papercut
On the nimble fingers of Chinese children
The revolution will not be optmised for search engines
Proliferating a hackneyed thesaurus of metatags

The swift daggerblow to the heart of cruel capital will be blunted
Amidst swarms of scatological threats and insults
Hurled at lefty journalists
For the cardinal sin of not pleasing everyone
Fight the good fight
Et tu, Toynbee

Politicians and cabinets shudder
As frantic researchers
List the waves of protest rocking the nation
“… but President, look at the numbers
Over two hundred thousand people have
Changed their profile pictures
In solidarity”
The game is up

As tanks advance
to within sight of the suburbs
Furious disputes rage on Wikipedia
Unpunctuated essays proliferate
Policy flourished on stone tablets
Debate only halted
To brush fresh flecks of descending artex from keyboards
Once more into the breach, dear friends

“Don’t panic-buy tinned food until you’ve read our tongue-in-cheek guide”
Is the second most read story
On the Guardian website
“a million united against shark attacks”
Gathers momentum

Rejoice! The polar bear picture got three million views
Henry – the servers need coal!
Free postage this week for Salvador Allende t-shirts on Amazon
Pollsters suggest that the singing cat video
makes people 6% more likely to vote Lib Dem
Comment: Is this a curse or a blessing?
Click here for American levels of tax
AND a Northern European welfare state
10% of this toothpaste goes direct to baby seals
Posing next to Mussolini’s corpse?
Use Sepia Tone to add that vintage touch
Hit them where it hurts by downloading this protest song
Just 79p a go
Tax deductable

A survey blinks on LinkedIn
Assessing your career prospects
Post ethnic cleansing
“Opportunities open up on a management level”
Whilst YouGov
Everyone still likes penguins
“A good, robust, if flightless bird”
A man in a wheelchair
Falling down a liftshaft
Is just ten views away
From displacing Odie the Talking Pug
From the top spot

“I love you Odie”
“I … LOVE … YOU …”
“There’s a good dog!”
“I … LOVE … YOU …”
“Good boy! Have a biscuit!”

When the last power station
Turns out the lights
And bulbs gasp at that shimmering rainbow drop
In the chuntering generators
Surrounding the bunker
One by one
The screens flicker
Strobe to a girl
With a clown
Surrounded by bars of colour
Playing noughts and crosses
Noughts and crosses
For eternity


This is one of those poems that nearly didn’t make it. The (blurry) picture above shows the various scraps of paper from which it was rescued. I don’t think I’m as cynical as this in real life. Maybe I’m just deluding myself – but I’ve never felt that a poem needs to reflect the true voice of the author. Apart from the bit where I pretend to be Odie the Talking Pug. We have the same birthday!

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1 Response to Stork Fountain

  1. Pingback: Social media activism stuff | Get Dancey

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